Zion Press, the lesser known cousin of the Babylon Bee…

Not everyone hates quarantine. Local mom Allison Smyth gushed about how much she loves it in her social media post. “It’s been wonderful! I have everything I need right here!” She went on to say that her baking skills have improved, as have those of the cherubs she is now homeschooling. “We have so much yeast and flour – we bought out Trader Joe’s right before this lockdown happened, so we have enough that if we make a mistake (here she added the laughing emoji to the post) we can just toss it and start over!” Her children, Kaytlin and Reagyn, commented in the post that homeschooling has just been such a blessing! “Our mom is amazing! She hasn’t lost her temper with us once and we are able to get the personal attention we need, for six hours every day! Since Mom has her MRS. Degree, she knows how to do everything perfectly, including Common Core math.
Mrs. Smyth went on to post “If anyone has a problem with their children or quarantine, they just need to look to their local and civic leaders who have our best interests at heart and aren’t in this for the political gain at all!” She further chastises those who don’t believe the YouTube scientists, because they “obviously want what is best for this country.”


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